Married Women Do It. Do You?

I read this great post by another married solo woman traveler (and I think she's even a Québecoise native also!). There must be something in the water here.

In the comments of that article, someone questioned, "what's the point of being married if you're going to be independent?"

What's the point of anything? LOL

Why wouldn't I suddenly want or need my autonomy? Why would I want to lose myself? Why would I want my husband to dictate where or when I leave the house? Why would I want to be with a man who doesn't allow me to live out my dreams or support me in that? Why would I want to be with a man who has no desire or ambition to follow his own dreams?

Why are women going along with this idea that they must stop desiring anything for themselves the minute they get married?

Men go off alone every day. They travel alone all the time. Why is it acceptable for them and not us?


To add another element, I have a kid. I didn't lose myself in motherhood anymore than I lost myself to marriage. So not only do I leave my husband when I travel (and he's a grown man, he can take care of himself!), I choose to leave my child also.

I choose to teach  my son that women can be strong. I choose to teach my son that woman can live their dreams. I choose to teach my son that women can be independent. I choose to teach my son that even though someone he loves may leave him now and then, she will come back refreshed and with new ideas and things to teach him. I choose to be a role model to teach him to trust himself. To inspire him to explore the world on his own and discover new things about himself.
I cannot always be with him and at some point I will have to be left standing at the airport, watching him go off on his own, tears in my eyes.

I Will Never Stop Traveling

Before I had a baby, people told me to get all my traveling done because I wouldn't be able to do it afterwards. I was always of the firm belief that my life should not stop because I'm a mom. After all, if I want to be a happy mom, I still need to be a happy person and part of what makes me happy is travel. I also believe (and now know for sure!) that babies are portable and washable.

So no, I will not stop traveling. I simply have a new travel companion now and when he is old enough to stay with someone else (he's still nursing and won't take a bottle) then I'll go off by myself if I want. Does it mean I won't miss him? Of course I will! But sometimes a mommy needs to go off and recharge her batteries. Then she can come home with stories and pictures and be a more happy mom.

It shows your child a wonderful independent side of you. Not only does it show that women can go off on their own, but that mommy can go away and come back and the world is ok - not just ok, but fun and there is so much to explore, to learn about, and be curious about!

Besides, as long as he still fits in my lap, I don't pay a thing (or very little) to have him come with me, so really, it's the best time to travel! He won't remember these trips, but we'll have pictures to look at and all those stamps in his passport.

I can only hope that I inspire him to grow up with the same curiosity about the world that I have and a zest for travel. But he has to promise to always write or call and come back to see his mommy regularly :)